Download PDF Mom, I'm Gay - Loving Your LGBTQ Child Without Sacrificing Your Faith, by Susan Cottrell
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Mom, I'm Gay - Loving Your LGBTQ Child Without Sacrificing Your Faith, by Susan Cottrell
Download PDF Mom, I'm Gay - Loving Your LGBTQ Child Without Sacrificing Your Faith, by Susan Cottrell
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It's finally here, the book so many of you have been asking for - with a special foreword by Justin Lee, author of Torn and Executive Director of The Gay Christian Network. "Susan Cottrell offers us a book from a Christian parent's perspective, in what will surely be an oasis in the desert for so many parents." - Justin Lee, Author of Torn and Executive Director of The Gay Christian Network ... "I often get asked by parents for resources that can address the struggles of raising LGBT sons and daughters without having to leave faith behind. Susan Cottrell's book, Mom, I'm Gay, does just that. This is the kind of book that parents will love. No one should ever have to choose between who they are, whom they love and what they believe. Sadly, though, many parents feel caught between their faith and love for their LGBT child. Cottrell helps parents find a way to see their faith as a means of helping them to love better, including loving their children better, no matter their gender identity or sexual orientation. I am very grateful for this book." - Sharon Groves, PhD, Director, Religion and Faith Program, The Human Rights Campaign "Susan's book captures the essence of what Christian parents struggle with when their child comes out. It challenges parents as they navigate the minefield of what they've heard in church and what think they understand from the Bible. What's unique is this book doesn't go the typical route of challenging verse-interpretation. The writing comes from Susan's heart as a personal experience of her faith and love for God and her family.
- Sales Rank: #1377669 in Books
- Published on: 2013
- Binding: Paperback
- 128 pages
Most helpful customer reviews
4 of 4 people found the following review helpful.
Good book, caused us to discuss, think and pray. Maybe some differing conclusions.
By Court2
She presents her point of view well. As a parent of an adult LGBTQ we need to find a loving way to have a loving relationship with our child, and as a Christ follower, without condemning or condoning some behavior we do not agree with. The author gives a good perspective on this, but, I'm not sure I come to all the same conclusions as she does. The author seems to have a perspective that all behaviors are OK as that is the way God made our children. God has made our children the way they are and we do need to accept that (and them), but some behaviors are still choices, and not ones we need to celebrate or condone. Yet, we still need to love them as Christ wants us to. A good book on the subject, and it caused my wife and I to discuss and explore ourselves, our beliefs, and our relationship with our child more.
3 of 3 people found the following review helpful.
What Unconditional Love is All About
By Virginia Ramey Mollenkott
Susan Cottrell is a mother and an author who knows how to define her topic and her audience and then stick to both of them. Her topic is how to love and support one’s children when they reveal their sexual or gender deviations from the norm, regardless of one’s dogma, ideology, or peer pressure. Her target audience is Christian parents of children who have trusted them enough to be truthful about their inner discoveries about themselves.
Refusing to get caught up in conflicting arguments, Cottrell handles biblical objection in a few deft sentences: “take those verses that trouble you, along with what you’ve internalized from church, and ask God about it… As I walked through this issue, God addressed my doubts specifically and lovingly, showing me that none of the biblical writers had any concept of a loving same-sex relationship” (p. 27).
Several times Susan Cottrell refers to “a protective mother bear” taking sides with her gay children. I wonder whether Cottrelll knows that the Bible depicts God as an angry mother bear (II Kings 2:24). Whether or not, it is a powerful image for the unquestioning zealous support Cottrell believes good parents owe to their children.
Cottrell has done her homework. She points out that today, 50% of Americans support marriage equality, as opposed to 46% in 2007, and only 27% in 1996. But regardless of such social change, the parental job remains constant—to support their children’s authenticity. Cottrell even suggest that perhaps God has given certain parents an LGBTQ child precisely in order “to set you free from the need to please!” (p. 57).
Cottrell points out that training a child “in the way they should go” literally means training them “according to their own particular inclinations—the way that God designed them” (p. 65). Always, the foundation to build on is Grace, never an absolutistic ideology or concept.
Cottrell reminds her readers of how much sexual standards have shifted through the centuries. With biblical approval, men formerly married multiple wives and took concubines; and if the story of Adam and Eve is taken literally their children had to have married one another incestuously. So our current attitudes about sex and gender had better be open and humble—embracing those children who discover they are transgender, or intersexual, or lesbian, gay, bisexual, or simply questioning.
Always, always, Cottrell calls for the Golden Rule. How would you have wanted your parents to respond if you had to tell them you were gay? Or transgender? Or whatever? Then respond exactly that way!
More than seventy years ago, when I knew I was lesbian and cowered in fear of discovery by my fundamentalist family, I could not have imagined a book like this one. I was in my thirties when God used my love for my son to show me I was acceptable just as I had been created. One night I was on my knees pleading with God for healing from my homosexuality, when a still small voice within me startled me with this question, “Virginia, what do you want for your son?” I answered, “I just want him to be happy.” And the Voice replied, “That’s exactly what I want for you!” So I stood up, stopped asking to be changed, and began to find ways to live joyously within the orientation I had been assigned by my loving Parent.
With books like Cottrell’s, hopefully hundreds of young people will be spared the long fearful alienation I had endured before that liberating moment. And hundreds of parents will be reassured that their children’s sex or gender orientation is not about them, is certainly not their fault, and provides opportunity to show what unconditional love is all about.
Spread the word!
0 of 0 people found the following review helpful.
Heartfelt and humble; compassionate and compelling!
By Jaron Terry
This is the single most helpful book I read when our son came out. We were already affirming of LGBTQ people, but once our son came out the way my husband and I were treated at our church of 25 years was very hurtful. Susan Cottrell's well-written, compassionate and compelling book helped us through the painful things that were attributed to the Bible by "friends" we though were educated. Susan's heartfelt, humble and well-researched book gave us peace about our sweet son, as well as power to shake the dust from our sandals and leave behind the ignorance of our former church. This book will be helpful to parents of an LGBTQ child - regardless if the child is 5 or 55 - and regardless if the parent is Christian or of another faith. I highly recommend "Mom, I'm Gay."
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